只有我，只有我活在过去的阴影里，随时随地没有预兆地呕吐和失声痛哭，只有我一个人一遍又一遍的打开纱布看被遮掩起来恶臭得不成模样的伤口，你们都长好了新肉往前走。只有我，只有我徒劳的挣扎，我全部的徒劳只能伤害到和我一样被阴影笼罩的人。当我还有残存的理智，我知道没有过不去与放不下，我知道无有不甘不愿，我知道无人愿意再提，可是每个夜幕降临，我离开欢乐的人群和拼尽全力的汗水，又独自一人的时候，我没法确认，放掉过去，还是我吗？你聪明的，告诉我，将来和过去如若都无意义，现在的存在是为了什么？而我只能闭口哑声地损耗自己，没力气恨与爱，没有出口表达。世界是一个建立在虚空上的废墟所有还存活的人类都在其他的星球，我不可以把你们拉回这个废弃的世界，也没有权利再把入土的尸体刨出来抱着哭。我只是那个假装会煮魔汤的巫婆，戳穿我的魔法你就会发现锅里鼎沸的只是我自己。“但是我又夢見了你。坐在那裏頭髮很灰。這一次你認得出我我也認得出你。爲此我已很想大哭。我知道爲了可以從此以後繼續向前一直走去頭也不回所以我又夢見了你。儘管一只熱綫號碼變成一個無人接聼的電話亭，手都酸了只因爲從沒能放下聽筒。”可是我还有那些被我拖下水面的你你你对此我无言以对，我的没意义的对不起只能一再坚定我再也不可以拖任何人下水的决心。可是肉身还存在，生亦继续延续，还有那些话要说事情要做时间要过而我都不想做不想说但时间亦一样要过。我以为能够解决的出口一件件都证明只是虚空，只是虚空，只是虚空，只是虚空，只是虚空，只是虚空，只是虚空，只是虚空，只是虚空。

I'm not looking for suggestions, which are very unlikely to help. And I'm pretty sure few people here would understand what I have experiended these days and why I should ever have any dissatisfaction .I'm not wounded by love but something much more cruel and it has always been sharping itself ,keeping hurting,hurting,and hurting.I was like a child by the sea crying and crying and building a sand castle which collapsed again and again before it ever existed, just like happiness for me.Trust me ,all my response just conveys I'm more than a brave one.For the night just passed I've been thinking, thinking, and thinking. And I told myself "everything is going to be okay" when I saw the dawn.Nothing would exist in the end; time will get rid of our pain, our glory, and us ourselves.只是虚空，只是虚空，只是虚空，只是虚空，只是虚空，只是虚空，只是虚空，只是虚空，只是虚空……